10 Days to a Less Defiant Child: The Breakthrough Program for Overcoming Your Child's Difficult Behavior
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behaviors. The information on ADHD and other disorders is particularly valuable. The sooner you get started with Dr. Bernstein’s plan, the sooner you will have a more peaceful home.” —MARIE PAXSON, coordinator of a support group for parents of children and teens with ADHD “Parents need to go no further; this book is THE resource book for parents of defiant and challenging children. 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child empathizes and actively supports parents like myself—who have looked fruitlessly
with your defiant child guarantees that you will lose. By learning to be calm and firm and using the additional strategies I provide later in this chapter, you will have all the tools you’ll need to avoid power struggles with your child. Calm and Firm Will Not Feel Natural As I’ve said in previous chapters, embracing the skills that I am giving you may initially feel unnatural and awkward. The same applies to my calm-and-firm approach. Al certainly felt awkward giving up his tough, old-school
school. Ben had been showing the knife to friends on the playground at recess when a teacher took notice and confiscated it. As a result of this, Ben was suspended for three days and allowed back on the condition that I write a note. Ben also had his fair share of conflicts on the bus and with peers at school. I worked with Ben and he made some strong progress in controlling himself. What helped immensely was Ben’s understanding and supportive teacher. In the beginning of the school year, Ben
brought to see me because he took a key and scraped it against his father’s car. Corey’s father had threatened that he would have to sleep with his light off—something Corey was very afraid of. Corey dealt with his fear by becoming more defiant. I helped Corey’s dad learn that Corey’s way of coping with his fear was to become defiant. In counseling with me, Corey learned to verbalize and work through his night fears instead of suppressing them and acting out angrily with poor behavior choices.
parents. Like many children with sniffling and eye movement tics, Julian had been relentlessly teased by classmates. He had poor self-esteem and had convinced himself that he was “freaky,” “stupid,” and “was going to have a horrible life.” Julian had begun dealing with these negative feelings by physically lashing out at his peers. I saw Julian for individual counseling to address his self-esteem issues. I also worked closely with his school. Julian’s teacher agreed to speak to his classmates