Homecoming: Reclaiming and Healing Your Inner Child

Homecoming: Reclaiming and Healing Your Inner Child

John Bradshaw

Language: English

Pages: 241

ISBN: 2:00156644

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub


Are you outwardly successful but inwardly do you feel like a big kid? Do you aspire to be a loving parent but all too often "lose it" in hurtful ways? Do you crave intimacy but sometimes wonder if it's worth the struggle? Or are you plagued by constant vague feelings of anxiety or depression?

If any of this sounds familiar, you may be experiencing the hidden but damaging effects of a painful childhood-carrying within you a "wounded inner child" that is crying out for attention and healing.

In this powerful book, John Bradshaw shows how we can learn to nurture that inner child, in essence offering ourselves the good parenting we needed and longed for. Through a step-by-step process of exploring the unfinished business of each developmental stage, we can break away from destructive family rules and roles and free ourselves to live responsibly in the present. Then, says Bradshaw, the healed inner child becomes a source of vitality, enabling us to find new joy and energy in living.

Homecoming
includes a wealth of unique case histories and interactive techniques, including questionnaires, letter-writing to the inner child, guided meditations, and affirmations. Pioneering when introduced, these classic therapies are now being validated by new discoveries in attachment research and neuroscience. No one has ever brought them to a popular audience more effectively and inspiringly than John Bradshaw.

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as an inadequate financial provider simply because she wanted to go to Australia. EMPTINESS (APATHY, DEPRESSION) The wounded inner child also contaminates adult life with a low-grade chronic depression experienced as emptiness. The depression is the result of the child’s having to adopt a false self, leaving the true self behind. This abandonment of the true self amounts to having an empty place inside. I’ve referred to this as the “hole in one’s soul” phenomenon. When a person loses his

Until recently, there has been little scientific evidence to support original pain work. Freud wrote extensively on repression, dissociation, and displacement as primary ego defenses. He taught that, once formed, these defenses function automatically and unconsciously. However, he could not explain exactly how these mechanisms work. For example, what happens in our brain when we stop our painful emotions? Body therapists have been able to describe some of the ways these defensive mechanisms

he can grasp their nonverbal aspect. If your mother was disappointed that you were a boy or didn’t really want you, she didn’t have to tell you so: you knew it. Dad may never have told you he was disappointed that you were a girl, but you knew it. More than likely no one ever told you that you weren’t wanted, but you knew it. Some children actually are told that they’re not wanted. One of my clients was told that her mother almost died when she was born; another was told that her father had

wanted her mother to have an abortion. I’ve heard many other cruel and unbelievable statements of this kind. Words are extremely powerful. Kind words can create a whole day of happiness. Critical words can put us in a funk for a week. Sticks and stones will break your bones, but names will hurt you more. Saying new, empowering words can touch our original pain and trigger great healing. Positive affirmations reinforce our beingness and can heal the spiritual wound. Pam Levin has stated that

Buddhists and became a celibate monk. His mom was proud of him and visited him often. After a number of years, Jimmy left the monastery and went through a series of relationships with women. He always found needy women for whom he could be a savior. At 45 he entered a disastrous marriage to an abandoned 26-year-old who had three children. The marriage was a vortex of conflict and withdrawal. Jimmy hated his stepchildren. Early on he had an affair, which led to out-of-control sexual acting out for

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